My Life in a Nut Shell
Jamie@ http://beingpositivewithadepressivesoul.blogspot.comBeing positive with a depressive soul, has definitely been a challenge. I am too often sad and feel so alone but it eventually passes. I am very sensitive. I think too much and always seem to care way too much about people who don’t feel the same way. I overthink everything. I worry too much. No wonder I have high blood pressure. I am mom to a teenage girl who has mental issues and she hasn’t been completely diagnosed yet. I work full-time outside the home as an Administrative Services Assistant and have a 2-year Associate degree from a business college and I am 10 classes away from a Bachelor degree. I guess I am smart enough to get by in life and luckily have common sense, along with my street cred. My personal life is a mess, as usual. I am wild at heart, always anxious with life, and hope that the best is yet to come. There you have it the condensed version of me.
Now, I have been suffering from major depressive disorder for about 24 years now. I have been on almost every medication there is and still at 42 I feel that I am just not getting the full benefit of my meds. Ughhhh! I definitely can say that there is seldom a dull moment in my life, let me tell you! I never thought long ago that I would turn out to be as strong as I am now. I guess lots of drama, tons of stress, extreme sadness , deep depression, loneliness, pain and heartache can do that to a person. Who knew?
Life has definitely been a beautiful struggle. I knew that I was ready for something different in my life, for once I wanted to change to come quickly. It has only been in the last year that I decided to stop hiding my depression, stop caring what others thought of me, and to be my authentic self.
I am no longer here to impress other people. I am here to live my best life with a little humor, try to help who I can when I can, and just to figure everything out about myself for once. But what I found first was that I decided to do something that I always wanted to do. Courage raised her brillant head and said “Just do it.” Confidence stepped in and said “Hell Yeah.” I always wanted to write, to be heard, and to be apart of something that I thought was extraordinary.
So I became a blogger. It has been the best decision I have ever made. One thing for sure about blogging is that keeping it reaI is a full-time job. But I wouldn’t have it any other way. I have chosen to set my private life to words by sharing the good, the bad, and the ugly in my life. Literally, my life in nut shell. We’re all crazy here! Sometimes chaotic, most of the time random, but always real. Since I cannot afford therapy:
Blogging has saved my life. Really! I wouldn’t lie to you. I was in desperate need of a hobby. I was going nuts with boredom and loneliness. I had to do something with my life and no, exercise was not an option. Besides, exercise could kill you or at least me. Blogging seemed much safer!
I have learned so much by starting from the bottom of the blogging ladder and working myself through the blogosphere one blog at a time. I read a lot of blogs for content, designing tips, tutorials on adding codes to templates, how-to add gadgets, buttons, and widgets; promoting and networking, all the while becoming a social media addict. Through all this hard work:
With dealing with depression, oodles amount of stress, and chronic fatigue most days of my life, I truly know now that I was meant to do this. I blog to stay positive, to support mental health, to raise awareness of mental illness, and to no longer hide my depression. Sometimes reality of my beautifully chaotic life has a way of rearing its ugly head. So when I am stressed and tired from life, work, and the computer there are a few things that I do to live more positively healthy and be better than okay. Of course there is nothing wrong with just being okay, don’t get me wrong, because some days that is all I am is okay. It is just that I need more to help keep my mind right like remembering to take my meds, to socialize more (equals no loneliness), so to stress less I compiled a list of things to keep me positively on my toes:
**Daily Reminders and Affirmations
Today I will express my authentic self and choose not to hide behind a false mask.
I accept I am right where I am supposed to be.
Every day in every way I am getting better and better.
I won't apologize for who I am.
I embrace my flaws, my weaknesses, my strengths, my desires for they are all mine.
I am me and I was given this life because I am strong enough to live it.
I will do what I see fit to live my best life.
My spirit is stronger than anything that can happen to it.--CC Scott
Always believe that something wonderful is about to happen.
**To Live One Day at a Time
I live my life one day at a time.
I try again today, even when it's hard.
keep going for just one more day, today.
After I try today, tomorrow I will try again.
from the daily love
** Never Forget to Laugh At Myself and to Find Humor in Every Day:
.
**Take Care of Me First:
Relax, Breathe, and focus!
I am in charge of my mental health.
**Always Be Myself:
I am me and that is all I can ever be.
Be yourself, everyone else is already taken.
I am sensitive, care too much, overthink everything, worry when I know
that it is a waste of time, feel emotions strongly, fall hard and fast, but always
love with all my soul.
**Must Be Positive. I am allergic to negativity:
**Find Wisdom in Each day:
**Reinvent Myself, Maybe Learn Something:
Knowledge is Power!
The only good is knowledge and the only evil is Ignorance…Socrates
**Find the Good and Beautiful in Everything and Everyone; Be Kind:
Now you know the things that keep me positively sane. Everything bad that has happened to me has only made me stronger. Everything good is yet to come and for that I have hope. Sometimes hope is all we have to keep going. But in the end:
Jamie Clark
Being Positive with a Depressive Soul
*All pics came from Facebook, Pinterest, or the Web and all authors of quote sand pics/sayings
are unknown unless stated. I do not own the original rights to any of the pics.
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